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A Packers Christmas Carol, by James Korsmo
I love Christmas. As I’m sure you have picked up by now, I also love the Packers. The time has come for two of my favorite worlds to collide. What better way for this to happen than to imagine what Christmas carols best represent Packers personnel? I can’t think of a more fitting way to pay tribute to my favorite team. Remember, these are my opinions, yours may differ. They would be wildly incorrect, but fa la la la la, la la la la.
Aaron Rogers
Rodgers is cool. He is smooth. A cerebral and physical force to be reckoned with, Rodgers is the gold standard of NFL quarterbacks. He is the epitome of his profession. If Aaron Rodgers were a Christmas carol, he would be “The Christmas Song” by Nat King Cole. You may know it better by it’s first lyric “Chestnuts roasting on an open fire”, but in any case it is the song by which all other Christmas songs should be measured. It’s also under-appreciated. Other Christmas songs get more play, and some people think Nat King Cole didn’t lead his orchestra very well, but this is the best Christmas song in the world.
Clay Mathews
Mathews is the driving force of the defense. He provides energy, a life force that the rest of the defense feeds off of. He is the human form of this version of “Santa Claus is Comin to Town” by Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band. If I were being extra particular, he is the bass line. Listen to that bass. Garry Tallent runs with that thing. It’s frenetic, all over the place, but completely in the pocket.
Eddie Lacy
Lacy came into this season with high expectations. The media and fans were certain that he would continue his successes from the last 2 years, and probably surpass them. It turned out to be false hope. Lacy got hurt, gained weight, lost interest, regained interest, lost it again, and forgot how to tell time, and now his reps are going to James Starks and a guy the Packers signed off the street on game day last week. To say this year has been a huge disappointment would be an understatement. Lacy’s Christmas music doppleganger is “I’m Gettin’ Nuttin’ For Christmas”. I know that reads funny, and I almost went with “I Want a Hippopotamus For Christmas”, but my point still stands. His gifts stay in the attic, and if he improves he can get them for his birthday.
Dom Capers
Just because it’s the most obvious song doesn’t mean it’s not true. “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch”, it is.
Randall Cobb, James Jones, and Davante Adams
This feels a little like a cop out, but I feel like all of them have played so similarly (Poorly. Extremely poorly.) that grouping them all under one entry is appropriate. They have had closed door meetings with coaches and Aaron Rodgers, they have ran different routes, they have been chastised and dressed down before God and creation, but nothing seems to help. Things have been pretty bleak for this group all year long. However, to my knowledge, there is one thing they haven’t tried. New footwear. For these reasons, their Christmas song is “The Christmas Shoes” by NewSong. (Don’t click that link. You’ve been warned.)
Last, but certainly not least….
Jeff Janis
What more can be said about Janis? Columns have been written, podcasts have been podcasted, water coolers have absorbed countless words from tired business people whom cling to the belief that he is the cure to the leprosy of the wide receivers. His presence on the field in an offensive formation brings forth emotion and hope from fans. Twitter timelines are clogged with unadulterated joy when number 83 is flanked out by the sideline. In fact, if you listen closely, you can almost hear “Hark the Herald Angel Sing”. Glory to the newborn king of Green Bay.
I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Please have a safe and fun holiday season. GO PACK GO!
Thank you for reading. James Korsmo is Lead Humor Writer at Titletown Sound Off. You can follow him on Twitter @jksub20. For even more Packers content, follow us on Twitter and Like us on Facebook.
Continue reading @http://titletownsoundoff.com/ ...
I love Christmas. As I’m sure you have picked up by now, I also love the Packers. The time has come for two of my favorite worlds to collide. What better way for this to happen than to imagine what Christmas carols best represent Packers personnel? I can’t think of a more fitting way to pay tribute to my favorite team. Remember, these are my opinions, yours may differ. They would be wildly incorrect, but fa la la la la, la la la la.
Aaron Rogers
Rodgers is cool. He is smooth. A cerebral and physical force to be reckoned with, Rodgers is the gold standard of NFL quarterbacks. He is the epitome of his profession. If Aaron Rodgers were a Christmas carol, he would be “The Christmas Song” by Nat King Cole. You may know it better by it’s first lyric “Chestnuts roasting on an open fire”, but in any case it is the song by which all other Christmas songs should be measured. It’s also under-appreciated. Other Christmas songs get more play, and some people think Nat King Cole didn’t lead his orchestra very well, but this is the best Christmas song in the world.
Clay Mathews
Mathews is the driving force of the defense. He provides energy, a life force that the rest of the defense feeds off of. He is the human form of this version of “Santa Claus is Comin to Town” by Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band. If I were being extra particular, he is the bass line. Listen to that bass. Garry Tallent runs with that thing. It’s frenetic, all over the place, but completely in the pocket.
Eddie Lacy
Lacy came into this season with high expectations. The media and fans were certain that he would continue his successes from the last 2 years, and probably surpass them. It turned out to be false hope. Lacy got hurt, gained weight, lost interest, regained interest, lost it again, and forgot how to tell time, and now his reps are going to James Starks and a guy the Packers signed off the street on game day last week. To say this year has been a huge disappointment would be an understatement. Lacy’s Christmas music doppleganger is “I’m Gettin’ Nuttin’ For Christmas”. I know that reads funny, and I almost went with “I Want a Hippopotamus For Christmas”, but my point still stands. His gifts stay in the attic, and if he improves he can get them for his birthday.
Dom Capers
Just because it’s the most obvious song doesn’t mean it’s not true. “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch”, it is.
Randall Cobb, James Jones, and Davante Adams
This feels a little like a cop out, but I feel like all of them have played so similarly (Poorly. Extremely poorly.) that grouping them all under one entry is appropriate. They have had closed door meetings with coaches and Aaron Rodgers, they have ran different routes, they have been chastised and dressed down before God and creation, but nothing seems to help. Things have been pretty bleak for this group all year long. However, to my knowledge, there is one thing they haven’t tried. New footwear. For these reasons, their Christmas song is “The Christmas Shoes” by NewSong. (Don’t click that link. You’ve been warned.)
Last, but certainly not least….
Jeff Janis
What more can be said about Janis? Columns have been written, podcasts have been podcasted, water coolers have absorbed countless words from tired business people whom cling to the belief that he is the cure to the leprosy of the wide receivers. His presence on the field in an offensive formation brings forth emotion and hope from fans. Twitter timelines are clogged with unadulterated joy when number 83 is flanked out by the sideline. In fact, if you listen closely, you can almost hear “Hark the Herald Angel Sing”. Glory to the newborn king of Green Bay.
I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Please have a safe and fun holiday season. GO PACK GO!
Thank you for reading. James Korsmo is Lead Humor Writer at Titletown Sound Off. You can follow him on Twitter @jksub20. For even more Packers content, follow us on Twitter and Like us on Facebook.
Continue reading @http://titletownsoundoff.com/ ...